Inspired by recent adventures, observations and conversations in various parts of Italy.
Yes, it seemed my dream of Tuscany was come true...
I was thrilled, thrilled when I received an email from Count Visone to join him and a bevy of wine essayists, journalists and even bloggers at his magnificent Tuscan estate, La Lupanaia, for a vertical tasting of his famed Brunellos. To be honest, I was just as excited to meet some of these writers as I was to taste the wine. Also to be honest, I had never tasted the wine before because it costs at least $95 retail (for the 2002), well beyond my modest means. I wanted to find out for myself why the Count's Topaia Riserva earns 95+ scores almost every year and was named wine of the year by the Gambero Rosso five times.
As I drove up the long, dramatic road to the castellate mansion in my rented Fiat Punto I saw helicopters whirring all around the broad lawns at the top of the mountain where the palace lies. I wondered if there had been a terrorist threat but soon came to realize that influential international wine writers and certified Italian journalists had been given rides.
When I arrived in the parking area as big as a soccer field, a brutal unspeaking man with tattoos on his shaved head pointed me to a spot in a far corner. As I staggered to the house with my bags, a scowling girl who was clad in black Versace, and who had a scarf wrapped tightly round her neck, led me to the door, impatiently beckoning me on. She led me to a stairway and dropped a key into my hand. "Terzo piano, ultima camera, da' sul garage." Fourth floor, last room, overlooks the garage. She shook her gelled ringlets and went away muttering.
I cultivated positive thoughts I as lugged my things up the flights of stairs. I foresaw the gala tasting that evening, meeting and exchanging ideas and information with the best and brightest of the world's wine writers. In this spirit of pleasant anticipation I settled into my little room, which had a single tiny light hanging from the ceiling. It was very hot and stuffy. The bed was possibly an antique, especially the mattress. Still, I was in heaven. Here I was, a mere blogger, in the company of the aristocracy, as it were, of the wine flack world!
The tasting was to begin at 7 sharp. I descended the stairs and was of course the only writer in the great hall as the staff placed glasses and little plates of bread at each taster's seat. I went back upstairs after they glared at me, then snickered and whispered among themselves. I was out of breath and it was already 7:15. Hot as the room was, I fell asleep. I had a dream that I went downstairs and met Andrea Immer Robinson, who goggled at me, and only then did I realize that I was naked. I think I was disassociating myself from my Joseph Bank blazer with a missing button and 8-year-old Ferragamo loafers, which I had had reconditioned for the occasion ($90).
I woke with a start and ran down all the stairs at 8 o'clock. I felt something was wrong.
No one was "tasting." They were all standing around drinking cocktails. They were eyeing one another competitively. There was a knot of English people which kept looking over its collective shoulder at a very large pumpkin-headed American and his claque. The French, Italians and Germans wandered around freely; they were in Schengenland after all. The Chinese were decked out in Prada and the Japanese in Gucci, and they gave each other chilly smiles over their straight whiskeys.
Presently a gong rang and we looked for our place cards. I expected to sit in a chilly dark corner, but somehow I found myself among a group of high-powered wine writers and critics from several nations, including the pumpkin-headed man. In front of each person was a line of 10 glasses. On the "programme" were written descriptions of ten vintages, including the dreaded 2002. The earliest was 1967.
As the tasting finally began, I knew something was wrong. Very wrong.
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